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How To Self-Regulate Your Emotions

a man touching his head in confusion

What are the 5 stages of Emotional Regulation?

  1. Awareness: The first step is being aware of your emotions and recognizing your feelings. This involves identifying and labeling the emotions you are experiencing.
  2. Acceptance: Once you know how to label and express your emotions, accepting them without judgment is important. Acceptance means acknowledging that your emotions are valid and understandable, regardless of whether they are positive or negative.
  3. Understanding: In this stage, you aim to understand your emotions’ underlying reasons or triggers. This involves exploring the thoughts, beliefs, or situations contributing to your emotional responses.
  4. Regulation Strategies: Once you better understand your emotions, you can employ various strategies to regulate them. These strategies can include deep breathing exercises, mindfulness techniques, cognitive reframing, seeking support, engaging in activities you enjoy, or taking a break to self-soothe.
  5. Emotional Integration: The final stage involves integrating regulated emotions into daily interactions. This means effectively expressing your emotions in a healthy and constructive manner, forgiving those who have hurt you, including yourself, and making empowered decisions that enable you to foster your emotional intelligence.

Do you still carry resentment, grudges, disappointments or anger towards people or events that hurt or betrayed you in the past?

In my practice, I describe ‘forgiveness’ as the conscious choice of releasing the burden of carrying someone else’s mistakes. 

And if you have ever dealt with an injustice of any kind, you probably know that it’s even more challenging to forgive ourselves for tolerating abusive (physically/emotionally/mentally) behavior 

In clinical psychology, ‘Capital T’ traumas are overt, extreme, and fit the common conception of a Trauma as a physical or mental imprint of abuse or another form of violation. 

In behavioral psychology — used by trained coaches specializing in inner child healing, like myself: ‘Lower T’ traumas are not so easily detected, and most people carry signs of unresolved trauma without even realizing it.

And this is why saying “I am fine” (if you are not!) is usually one of the most spread lies people involuntarily say when they refuse to accept healing as a pathway to experiencing freedom and healthy relationships. 

Pretending that you “don’t need help” is an illusion created by your brain to keep you safe from facing trapped memories that may trigger unhealed wounds. 

Curiosity, flexibility, and acceptance of your reality lead to transformation and resilience. 

If you are not curious about your challenges and how to resolve them, you begin to resent them, or transfer blame to others. 

If you’re feeling extra sensitive in your emotions or scattered in your thoughts, this is a sign your soul is releasing stagnant energy or self-limiting beliefs.

Acceptance leads to courage, and courage leads to Confidence and unconditional (self)-love. 

Asking for help is a form of courage and not a weakness. 

Remember, you are not alone on your path of healing and emotional regulation♥️

Do you want to build the type of confidence that helps you to improve your communication with others?

I can help!

Enroll in my Confidence Course here.

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