How To Handle Criticism Without Judging Back
Those words of eternal wisdom are credited to Aristotle, who spent his life pondering the variables that could create a better structure for a thriving society.
One of the postulates for a harmonious life, according to his teachings, is one`s
conscious liberation from dependence on other people’s thoughts and opinions.
Criticism and judgment are usually
co-dependent. When we experience criticism, we tend to
judge back and get defensive. Conversely, when criticizing others (in a non-constructive manner), we often project our own
inner judgment and insecurities.
We are going to receive criticism no matter what we do or do not do. The only leverage we have against judgment is our own self-perception.
The way we see ourselves is mediated through the energy we project to others.
Ironically, when we meet criticism
with defensiveness and reciprocal judgment, we mirror the same energetic frequency we are actively judging.
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Ultimately, it is our ego that simulates the fear of separation from the collective consciousness.
What you think of yourself is vibrating in the energy you project to others. If you are confident in yourself and firm in your actions, you will start to attract more people who support you on your path than those who disagree with you.
You will also remember that
wanting to be right at all costs comes from the ego. The heart holds place for compassion and understanding of our own bias. Eventually, your decision
not to judge others for judging you will create space for the people who love and accept you for who you are. Others` judgment and criticism is a
reflection of their own struggles and insecurities. Judgment in itself clouds compassion (for ourselves and others) and creates
a false separation between us and the world.
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We judge what we don’t understand.
We judge those who have judged us for judging them. We judge ourselves for holding judgments around our insecurities, failures in life, or past disappointments. We judge situations that test our patience.
We judge those who are not like us. We judge those who are exactly like us.
We can’t stop the judgment from entering our minds, but we can monitor and align it to a place of understanding, tolerance, and respect for different points of view.
Choosing not to judge will not block criticism from coming but will
shield you from internalizing it. Living life from a place of love and inner peace creates the safe space you need to
protect yourself from attacking back and mirroring the same tendencies you are judging in others.
When in doubt, ask yourself:
“Am I speaking from my heart, or am I speaking from my ego?”